Archive for November, 2007

That’s right, folks. Don’t question the wisdom of the almighty Doughboy. NaBloPoMo: I r teh win!

It’s a Friday night, and how am I celebrating my blogging victory? Going out for dinner? A movie? Crashing a party? Hitting the bar?

E, none of the above. In typical hermit-blogger fashion, I’m taking pictures of my Christmas decorations, catching up on the DVR, and letting the cat sleep on me again. I also ordered take-out, just to shake things up a little. I might get really crazy and drink half a Mike’s and fall asleep by 9. Hey, the night is still young!

I feel like I should end NaBloPoMo with a bang, but I’m not sure how to do that. I’m kinda outta “bang”.

Let me just say, I’m proud of myself for sticking to it. It’s an accomplishment for someone who usually writes once a week, at most. I will probably continue to blog more after this, now that I’m in the habit. I can’t promise I’ll blog every day, but I’ll try for more often than once a week.

I spent part of the evening making old-fashioned decorative chains from craft paper and attempting to make some of these ornaments. The paper chain looks cute, the ornaments, not so much… but I wasn’t cutting them right. “Rulers? Straightedges? Bah! I’ll eye it!” Me? Eye it? I can’t cut a straight line to save my life.

I would totally take a picture of the pretty Christmas lights and the snowflakes and decorations and everything… but I have this cat sitting on my chest and he’s warm and snuggly… and I don’t feel like moving. I think the only thing that could motivate me to move right now is chocolate.

Mmmm… chocolate… I may have to shove the cat aside after all…

The halls are decked (well, almost) and I’m full of Christmas cheer, which comes in the form of Mike’s Hard Cranberry Lemonade (yet another reason why Canada should rule the world, in my not-so-humble opinion. Canadians, you should really get on that!)

If you’re lucky, you’ll find a 4×6 print from me in your Holiday Sampler this month! I also have some Cupcake Girl ornaments in there, courtesy of Hey Pretty Cupcake. I am eagerly awaiting my own Holiday Sampler in the mail. Yay, goodies!

OK, I’m going to cut this short… I feel icky.

Sometimes I think I exist solely for the purpose of being a walking human cat bed. Hmm… I wonder why that is? …

I have “Both Hands” stuck in my head… the song, not my hands. That would be ew.

I’m putting up Christmas lights and decorations this week! Which is fun! Except the suction cups I use to fix the lights to the windows never work! And I spend half my life watching them fall down! Then I put them back up! Repeat fifty-thousand times! I’m like a well-trained hamster! It’s so great, this decorating thing! Hence the over-use of exclamation points! !!!!

Feh. I think it’s time for bed.

I’ve felt inspired recently, which is a nice turn of events, all things considered. I keep a file of ideas for photo shoots, and lately it’s growing and growing. I like when this happens. Sometimes I think I’d be content to collect ideas and leave the picture-taking to someone else… but there’s something so satisfying about seeing the images in your head unfold in front of the camera. Usually they surprise me.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the process of making art–more specifically, my process, which isn’t much of a process at all, truth be told. I’m too passive, in that I’m content to wait for ideas to come to me rather than actively seek them out. I’m content to dabble but never commit fully, because I’m afraid that the results won’t be what I’m looking for. I’m afraid to fail, and you can’t fail at what you don’t start.

Thinking creatively doesn’t come as naturally as I’d like it to. There was a point in my life where it did, when I was very young–too young to truly understand the meaning of “not good enough”, and making things was an act that gave me the purest pleasure. I held up my craft paper sculptures and little felt dolls and was proud of them simply because they were mine.

(Just imagine what I could do if I had that kind of innocence now! What any of us could do, for that matter.)
Fear gets in the way of good art-making. It’s hard to push past the doubt, to acknowledge the prospect that all your hard work could be for naught. I spend far too much time arguing with myself. “That one’s a good idea, but it’s been done before.” “I could do that, but I don’t have X, Y, or Z.” And there are the old standbys: “I’m not talented enough. I’m not good enough. I don’t have enough time.”

Excuses. Lies. Fear.

But I’ve found that the simple act of acknowledging that fear is enough to help me push it aside, if only a little. And it’s so much more fun having ideas when I’m not afraid of failing them before I’ve even tried!